Adoption Interview

Adoption Bloggers Interview Project 2012

Tuesday, January 06, 2009

What I Wished For

You know that old saying, "Be careful what you wish for because you just might get it," Well I stated in my last post that I couldn't wait for February to get here so that we could meet with the developmental pediatrician at the Riley Clinic. Well, late yesterday afternoon we got a call from the clinic to say that there was a cancellation and would we like to come in early. Of course! Early, however, meant tomorrow! Yikes! My paperwork wasn't all filled out. I hadn't compiled a collection of videos of Hannah displaying the behaviors of concern. I didn't have any videos of her at school. AND worst of all, I had NO videos of a serious meltdown. I know, I know, I should have been compiling these all along and there should be plenty of videos if the behavior is abundant enough. . . . but you see I don't want to video Hannah doing stuff just to video tape her and I certainly can't command meltdowns on cue. Who wants to sit and tape their child having a meltdown anyway? Besides, there are much more important things to do during a meltdown like making sure she's safe, others are safe, and seeing if she might be coming out of it. So, we will be going in tomorrow sans meltdown video and with a crude assortment of videos I was able to dredge up that highlight some of the behaviors we worry about and I hope that my descriptions of the rest will be sufficient for now.

As for other updates, Hannah was being quite a stinker the other day at the dinner table and was playing around with her food instead of eating and then shoving entire chicken nuggets in her mouth and screeching. I warned, threatened, even came close to bribing her to chew her food and not to talk with her mouth full because she could choke. And then it happened. The screeching abruptly ceased, her eyes popped wide open and her mouth moved noiselessly. My heart stopped for the briefest of seconds, but before I could even jump from my seat she turned red faced and began to cough. The nugget shot out across the table and Hannah stared at me unphased as if nothing had happened and continued her babble while I sat unable to breathe, think, or speak. Once I recovered I of course lectured her about talking with her mouth full and how she had just choked on her food and that would not have happened if she had waited to talk until she was done chewing. All the while I'm lecturing, Hannah has begun to eat finally and is repeatedly assuring me that "When I'm done with my chicken I will talk," even as she is currently chewing and talking at the same time. We battled the entire rest of the meal over this. Not once did she stop talking and chewing, nor did she stop informing me that she would talk once she was done eating! UGH!

Hannah has become really interested in coloring inside the lines lately and is quite perfectionistic about it. She will carefully move her crayon back and forth to fill in all the white space, but still lacks some of the control to be completely precise. When she moves her hand just a little too far or too fast and the color shoots outside of the lines she will say, "Uh oh, uh oh, uh oh, uh oh" over and over again until I am able to reassure her that it really is ok. This type of perfectionism seems to be everywhere these days. If she gets stuck while saying the Lord's Prayer she will become really upset after trying once or twice to get past a tricky spot and say, "I don't know the words, I don't know the words, I can't say it." It doesn't matter that no one told her to say it, that she was just reciting it on her own in her car seat. If she can't remember it then the world might just as well be ending. The same thing happens with her phone number. We hadn't practiced it for months and then the other day she randomly decided she was going to say it and starting reciting the numbers over and over, but kept getting stuck at the same part. She eventually became so angry that she started hitting herself in the head!

Hannah has been quite interested in stoplights for the past month or so. She can be quite the little backseat driver too! It doesn't matter if the other cars ahead of us aren't moving yet, green means go and we should be going! She'd fit right in in NY City! She knows that green means go and red means stop and what the turn arrows mean. This week she asked for the first time about the yellow light. I briefly explained it to her and then she was on to another subject. Tonight we were driving home from therapy and it was already dark out. We came up a hill and there was a sign with a yellow flashing light cautioning that there was a stoplight just over the top of the hill. Hannah called to me from the backseat, "What's that yellow light mean, Mommy?" I told her it was a warning about the stoplight coming up. She said, "Does it mean slow down." I had to think about it a bit and then decided that yes it did mean slow down. So, I rephrased my answer and said that yellow lights mean slow down or warning. Then she saw a car ahead of us turn on it's turn signal. It flashed bright yellow. She asked, "What does that yellow light mean, Mommy? Does it mean slow down or warning?" She'd caught me again. "That light means that the car is going to turn right. It's called a turn signal." She still needed clarifying, "A turn signal means slow down or does it mean warning?" I said, "I guess it means both. It means warning, I'm about to turn. You should slow down so that you don't hit me." Like lightning she was on to the next question, she'd seen brake lights go on. "Do those red lights on the car mean stop?" "They tell us that that car is stopping and we might have to stop too so that we don't hit them," I said. The car then let off it's brakes and started to speed up. "Where are the car's green go lights?" she inquired. That did it, I was stumped. How can you refute such logic? If cars have red stop lights and yellow slow lights, why then DON'T they have green go lights too? She waited patiently for me to answer as I stalled trying to think of a decent response. Thankfully an interesting song came on the radio and I was saved the embarrassment of being out thunk by a toddler. Why hadn't I ever stopped to consider why cars don't have green go lights. Sometimes her ability to reason so adult like astounds me. It makes the tantrums and normal illogical moments of toddlerhood that occasionally sneak into my days seem so out of place. Can you believe she only turned 2 1/2 years old today?!? Seriously what little 2 1/2 year old girl even gives a hoot about the similarities and differences between traffic lights and vehicle lights? Only my little girl, only my little girl. I'm so proud of her. Happy Half Birthday Hannah!

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